After this horrible winter I am moving to the hot Amazon rain forest.
I would rather wrestle an anaconda than deal with the snow and ice.
I would rather let a tarantula crawl up my pants leg than deal with another freezing day.
I would fight a tribe of man-eating headshrinkers, as long as it is above eighty degrees.
This last slip on the ice caused a rib fracture and two sleepless nights of pain.
Enough! Amazon, here I come. Goodbye, cruel North.