Beyond my will I am being forced to become a vegetarian.
The nurse poked my finger for a blood sugar check, and she said molasses came out.
She then took my blood pressure–the meter exploded and tore her blouse wide open.
Goodbye Burger King Whopper, over the years you hurt me deeply.
Goodbye Popeyes whole menu, you broke my heart.
So long Prime Rib, I loved you as often as I could, but it’s over now.
As a vegetarian, I pledge to eat tremendous amounts of kale, tofu, bean curd, and spinach,
and never cut the cheese.