In a good mood, I gave Nurse Mary the thumbs up. She got a mean look on her face and gave me the finger. Dewayne in the chair next to me saw this and told me she was signaling that I was number one. This is the third finger she has given me. She once told me she was on her third divorce. That all men are assholes.
I’m still going to keep a positive outlook on this. I think she may want me. I lost over two pounds last month and this is going to spur me on to perfect my body. When she finally succumbs to my charms, she will be impressed.
I loved Candice as I love all good-looking women. She told me she was leaving to head a new clinic on Forty. I told her I wanted to go there. I couldn’t take it that she was leaving, and, it was much closer to my house. The Grand Opening party was interesting–Candice, who had shown no real interest in me before, gave me a tremendous hug in front of some local dignitaries. She knew she was not going to see me again. The new clinic doesn’t take my insurance.
She put a latex glove on my hand. Her name is Suebee. She is from Nepal. When she pulls the one inch needle from my bicep she covers the hole with gauze. She tapes it, then I put my finger on it so it can clot. She walks away.
The blood streams out from under my finger. Suebee I’m bleeding, I yell. By the time she comes back a puddle is forming under my arm. More gauze, more pressing. She smells like Lilies of the Valley. When I stand up I tell her, if it looks like I’m going to fall please wrap your arms around me tightly. She says, shut up Stephen.
Life is just a bunch of moments. What if I kicked the bucket tomorrow?
Billions before me have already kicked it. Nobody really knows where you are going. This mystery is very scary. I will keep going, I will carry on. Enjoying life whenever possible.
I have goals: I want to make whoopie with a woman at least one more time. I want to get a kidney transplant and get my energy back. I want to fall in love. If I can achieve all three goals I expect many more happy moments.
I follow a very restrictive kidney diet–for about two days. That’s about how long I have ever lasted on a diet. When I get really hungry you might find me in line at Subway ordering double meat, double cheese on a foot long roll. All the vegetables, mayo and red pepper relish.
I eat this heavy meal very quickly. I enjoy this short time period. Call me a pig–I don’t care. Do not take the joy out of my life. I will fight back.